Un-screwing your life....

"A man sooner or later discovers that he is the master-gardener of his soul, the director of his life"

We all have read or heard this quote by James Allen, but have we actually understood it.?

And if someone says he/she did, have they followed it.?

The events in your life and the decisions you make design the course of your life..

It all comes down to the creativity of your mind..

Your mind creates events, which may or may not happen..

There might be no reality associated with it..

Your mind creates a virtual world around you, a work of your imagination..

Here are a few tips which will prevent you from screwing up your life...

• Don't worry about your personality: 'personality' is a concept invented by your mind..
  Personality is a word for the impression that you give through words.. You have a unique 'personality'..
  The good or bad personality actually never exists in reality..
  It is just a comparison with someone the person feels compatible with.. Personality has no universal definition.!!!
• Don't be concerned that your life isn't going as planned: the closer you stick to a plan, the quicker you will go away..
  The world constantly changes.. Your analysis of the situation  during the creation of the plan would be of no use a few days or months later..
  If you are desperate to have a plan, keep making amendments according to the current scenario..
• Stop being concerned about what others say about you: events or people are simply events or people.. They can't make you anything(neither good nor bad)..
  You are the only one having control over your life..
  Whatever emotions arise in you are a result of an external stimulus.. They are powerless unless you decide to get carried away by them..
• Stop feeling guilty: guilt changes nothing..
  It might make you feel that you are claiming responsibility, but it can't produce anything new in your life..
  If you feel guilty about something you've done, change it or accept that you have screwed up..
  Do you have any other option.?
  And if you are guilty about what someone else did, you are insane.. Consult a psychiatrist.!!
• Stop criticizing yourself: stop judging yourself based on your deeds.. It will only make you feel worse..
  Whatever you do, someone else will always do better..
  It makes no point in comparing yourself with others..
  There are people better than you and also worse than you..
  Accept this fact.!!
  Judging others is foolish since you cannot know all the facts and cannot create a reliable scale..
• Stop expecting: its human tendency to expect things from people close to them..And often it all ends up in disappointment..Others fail to meet your expectation and its you who suffers from the mental trauma..
  
  Follow these tips and you will never face a 'depression' or that phase of 'ultimate sadness' in your life..

26/11: The Day Mumbai Stood Still...!!!

On 26th November, 2008 an international terrorist group send 10 terrorists to India's biggest City and commercial capital, Mumbai..
Their mission was to kill and kill indiscriminately..

They split into groups and went to the most popular locations in the city..
The first was Leopold Cafe, a tourist spot..
The cafe was bombed followed by endless firing till everyone was dead..

VST, a railway station was their second target..
The duo fired mercilessly at innocents.. Ajmal Kasab was one of them.. Parents were killed before their children.. Husbands before their wives..
There was blood all around and cries of helplessness..
The policemen deployed by Railway Security there had no option than to run away considering the fact that their only weapons were obsolete rifles and pistols, which were in no comparison with the terrorists' assault rifles...

The Trident Oberoi, which is among the best hotels in the country was not spared too..
The Taj Palace & tower was soon followed up with..
They began killing anybody in their sight..
Nariman Point, a Jewish centre was their next destination..
Innocent people were killed on the name of God.. To attain salvation.. To die as a martyr and not as a common man..

10 armed men took over the entire city in a few minutes..
The terror continued for about 3 days..
This incident shook the entire world..
170 were killed and over 300 injured in this attack..
This was not an attack on India or Mumbai.. This was an attack on humanity..

Could this have been averted.?
India had Intelligence reports of an attack of this scale in advance, but they did not bother to alert any security agency..
No additional security was deployed at Airports or Railway terminals..


Is our police force well trained to handle these kind of attacks..?
Is the weaponry enough against assault rifles and AK47's..?
Are the politicians too self-obsessed that they don't care for the common man..?
When will public be given enough security.?
When will the agencies get over the "chalta hai yaar" attitude.?



Its 2011.. Three years since the attack.. And our terrorist guest still enjoys a life of luxury..
Does the Indian custom of "atithi devo bhava"(the guest is god) being followed in case of a National criminal too.?
16 crore INR has been spent on him so far..
Will he ever be hanged.?
Will the victims get justice.?
Is India waiting for another incident to happen.?

Many questions to be answered..


The pain remains deep in every Indian's heart.. Thoughts and prayers to all those who lost a loved one..

The Indian Democracy..!!!

Democracy is the form of government in which people are governed by their own elected representatives..
It is a government of the people, for the people and by the people.. In this system, it is the people who are supreme.. They control the government..

Democracy depends on the following conditions: co-existence of ideas and of parties; right to free discussion..

Speaking of the world's largest democracy, INDIA..
Our democracy is a government by and for the "rich and influential"..
This group which comprises of businessmen and politicians make up for less than 5% of India's population..
They make rules.. Amend them.. Abolish them.. And no one dares to question them, afraid of the consequences..


The representatives elected by the people, who were supposed to act as a bridge between social thought and political decision, remain busy fighting among themselves..
They are only interested in coming to power.. A path to extreme corruption..
In this form of government, where people are considered to be the supreme authority, one-fourth of the population goes to bed empty stomach.. Millions are below the poverty line..

Our democracy has given us 6 Fundamental Rights:

• Right to equality
• Right to freedom of speech and expression
• Right against exploitation
• Right to freedom of religion and freedom to reside in any part of India
• Cultural and educational rights
• Right to constitutional remedies for enforcement of Fundamental Rights

Now, coming to reality..

Equality is something that is completely lost.. Discrimination on basis of caste and religion..

You cannot speak against anything wrong that you've seen or heard.. And in case you do, be prepared to face the consequences(which might include filing of false law-suits against you, black-mailing or in extreme cases killing)..

The poor are always victims of exploitation(physical or mental) by the rich..

Educational rights exist only on books.. Education is only for those who can afford it contrary to the policy of "education for all"..

These Rights apply only to those who can influence the government..

Justice isn't delivered to the common man.. But bails are granted to those who are involved in frauds amounting to 8000 crore INR..

Now, speaking about the conditions of democracy..

Ideas never co-exist between any two political parties..

Discussion would be an obsolete word in the Parliament, which should soon be replaced by shouting and abusing(and also beating)..

Indian Democracy is a myth..!!!!

Love..!!

Love is an emotion of strong affection and attachment..
It can be towards your parents, relatives, friends or partner..


Love or pyaar(in Hindi), refers to a variety of different feelings, states, ranging from pleasure to interpersonal attraction.. It may also refer to the passionate desire and intimacy of romantic love..
According to me, love cannot be defined, it can only be expressed..
Love is the language of actions..


Every religious scripture has a mention of 'love'..
Love towards mankind.. Love for everything in the world..
Love has its references in Greek mythology(Aphrodite, the Goddess of love)..
But do we follow these principles.? I'm afraid, we don't.!


Unfortunately, our film industry has misinterpreted 'love'..
The films we watch show love as a mere attraction between opposite sex(or now, the same sex)..
Passionate kisses, love making has become the only way of showing affection..
It introduced a concept of 'Love at first sight'..
And the crowd followed it..
Earlier, it was the trust and understanding which was the foundation of a relationship..
Honestly speaking, today's love is filmy.. Inspired by romantic flicks..
Sometimes, it also gets impractical and humorous..


Love in the 21st century has become 'accessible'..
If you are looking for a partner(not the relationship material, though), join a social networking website.. Send friend requests to anyone.. And when they accept the request, start flirting..
And to make things worse, there are 'Love finder' websites, which guarantees you a girl friend/boy friend in 3 months or your money will be refunded..
Well.. The youth is so desperate to have a partner and these websites do exactly what's required- provide a medium..
Today's love is tainted..!!
Hence, the word 'break up' came into existence..


If you've read Romeo-Juliet or the Indian Heer-Ranjha, it is evident that there is no reference to a temporary 'break up' and then a 'patch up'..
That was true love, the purity of which is unmatched..

Love is something that happens by itself..
You don't have to force it upon someone..
And if you break up, its only because the partner was not compatible with you..


Every relationship starts with being 'just friends' and then things just happen regardless of the consequences.. Eventually, if the two are compatible it turns out to be a happy ending.. And if they are not, 'love' is blamed for..
Love is pure.. The people involved may not be..


Sadly, 'Love' was wrongly understood by the mortals..
Love is more than just affection..
I don't say that its magical and musical like you've seen in many movies, but its definitely an amazing feeling when you have that special person in your life and you are sure that he/she will never leave you..

Criticism..

Criticism is the judgement of the merits and demerits of someone or something..

But unfortunately, it has got a different meaning in the 21st century..

Technically speaking, to criticize does not necessarily mean to find faults..

Today, the word is taken to mean the simple expression of disapproval..

'Insult' would be a more appropriate word in this context..

Dale Carnegie said, "Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain but it takes character and self-control to be understanding".

Books, movies, television shows, automobiles, people..

In-fact, everything is criticized..

In other words, criticism is just a person's perspective about something..

Things start getting ugly when this 'perspective' is adopted by others.. Or rather, publicized in such a creative way that others grasp it..

I feel that every person has a personal opinion on things and that shouldn't be changed..

Let me give an example..

Do you watch a movie which is given low ratings by a critic.?

You would say a 'no' unless you are a die hard fan of the actor/actress..

The funny thing is that people absorb the negative part of the criticism without actually watching the movie..

You could actually like the movie.. But do you give a try.?

Well, the futile human mind takes anything that is fed into it..

Criticism among the members of the same species in nothing new to us..

I refer to humans here as they are they only ones capable of indulging in this pointless activity..

A person speaks, which is misunderstood in a different context by the other and it is then spread like wild fire..

People are not understood, they are assumed..

Thanks to the man's talent of spreading rumours, you are portrayed as a completely different individual to the world..

Completely different from who you are..

It is said that Criticism is a step to success..

Absolutely true..!!

When others are busy assuming who you are, you can do wonders being 'yourself'.. The real 'you'..!!!

Sometimes being different from the crowd or having an 'out of the box' thinking might push you into the web of criticism..

Emmet Fox said, "Criticism is an indirect form of self-boasting".

The problem arises when you start taking this criticism too seriously..

Some go into depression while the over-sensitive lot end up giving their lives..

This is a social issue and everyone has to face it..

India's constitution has given its citizens too much freedom, I believe..

Having a right to speak does not include the right to insult..

I wish, people were more sensible to understand this..

The Indian Education System..

According to a popular website, 'Education' is an act or experience that has a formative effect on mind, character or physical ability of an individual..
Does this apply in India.?


The world respects Albert Einstein, Issac Newton and many scientists because of their out of the box thinking and innovative approach to the simple things in life..
My question is, where exactly is India's Einstein or Steve Jobs or Bill Gates.?
I find it difficult to answer this but I am pretty sure that the problem lies in the system..


The nature of our education system inhibits our attempts at being creative thinkers as it is basically memory oriented..
We have only theory without any context to it..
The process is to memorize our way to glory in the run up to the board exams..
Memory is necessary to survive in the competitive global environment but too much of it blocks the creative urge within our system..


Our education system is so rigid and binding that it pushes us into one narrow path with no way back once we are inside it..
We are fed text from the books with no scope of questioning why and what it is all about..
On the contrary, the American system provides flexibility with the courses unlike the Indian system..
The subjects are forced onto us here..
Why does a Computer Science Engineer have to learn 3D drawing of a solid object.?
Why is C language programming taught to a Mechanical Engineer..?
Why do we have to learn the postulates of a theory that has failed.?


The English system we adopted never changed from the days of British rule in India..
Other nations have made vital amendments looking at the global market..
Are the authorities so lazy or are they scared to bring about a change.? Wish I had an answer..


And in India, we have the world class IITs, but whether they are innovation driven is a different question..
I also find it amusing to know why none of them are world beaters at the innovative game..
According to a survey by "times higher education", India's no. 1 institution IIT bombay ranks 317 on a global level..
There were 5 criteria taken into consideration, namely teaching, research, citations, industry income and international outlook..


Innovation is producing a new concept and revolutionizing it..
Most of the IItian's are in prominent positions working under some big bosses but not necessarily produce Nobel Prize winning innovations..


Education should be about acquiring and application of skills and not just memorizing formulae and derivations..
The focus should be on skills since it is the key to adapt to various scenarios..
The Indian system has its own advantages in terms of enhancing our mental storage, but that alone does not help in today's world..


Our education system needs to be redefined to focus on the areas of exploration and creativity..!!

The Roadies Experience...

Roadies or more precisely MTV HERO ROADIES..

The television show, Indian youth is crazy about..

Every year thousands participate in the auditions out of which only 18-20 are selected..

The rest, try their luck next year..

This Year(2011), Hyderabad was chosen as an audition city..

And being a fan of this show, I decided to give it a try..

This is the 9th edition of Roadies, which certainly makes it more difficult.. The events get more uncertain..

I never wanted to be a part of the Roadies journey, but something pulled me to the auditions.. I wanted to experience the madness..

Wanted to be a part of it..!!

The form was filled and on the morning of 11th October, I was all set to face it.. I was well aware of the fact that this could change my life.. I could get abused on National television..
But that was secondary.. This act of 'time pass', could backfire.. I had already made up my mind and could not back off at the last moment..


I reached the venue at 8am..
To my surprise, there were only 300-400 participants..
Well.. This is not Delhi or Chandigarh, where participants come to the venue before sunrise.. Now, that is CRAZY.!!!
The atmosphere was electrifying.. The energy was amazing..
People from all over India had come to try their luck..
There were people who had come all the way from Chandigarh and Jammu to give their audition..
There were 2000 participants at the venue by 10:30am..

We were escorted into an auditorium where the proceedings took place..
The trio, Raghu Ram, Rajeev Laxman and Rannvijay Singh would be there soon..
The participants were excited waiting to see the stars on the stage..

Meanwhile, there were dance performances by the participants as the DJ played latest tracks..
The girls took the limelight(as expected)..
The anchor was brilliant.. I never got bored sitting there..
The energy was at an another level, which cannot be explained in words..

Then came the moment, we all were waiting for..
The twins along with Rannvijay came on the stage at 12:45pm..
The crowd swung with joy.. The participants stood on the seats just to get a glimpse.. There were flashes and only flashes..
That moment can never be forgotten..!!!
When people you admire are just 30 odd feet from you..
Amazing feeling...!!

After a brief interaction with the Roadie aspirants, they made an exit..
For the next 5 minutes I could not believe that the person(Rajeev Laxman) I had spoken with on the phone was really on the stage..


Soon, the next group was called for the Group Discussion round..
I was a part of it(Outlaw No. M-1474)..
There were mixed feelings.. I wanted to crack the GD but was scared to face the trio at the personal interview..
I was prepared to speak on several topics.. But as we all know, on Roadies, nothing happens as expected, the topic which the group was given was completely different from what I had anticipated..
Nevertheless, it went well.. Our moderator was quite friendly and  above all, a Punjabi.!!
I was short-listed for the PI.. My video was made by the Roadies Crew, which would be shown to the other moderators and Raghu Ram before making the list of finalists for the Personal Interview..


I was not selected..
Probably because I did not have a large personality as most of the other participants had.. Or they felt that I was not as confident as others..


What ever be the outcome, this day cannot be forgotten for a life time..
The fun I had with friends.. The different people I met.. The way I handled a new topic at the GD..
A whole new experience.!!


And yeah, I'll try again next year.!

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Happiness...

Happiness is one among many things, which do not have a perfect definition..

It changes with every situation and priority..

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up, as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it"

This quote by Fyodor Dostoevsky, always gives me a ray of hope during the time of emotional turmoil..

Well.. For a moment it feels good..

I can say 'happiness' is just another word for contentment..

Or a distraction from Human tragedy..

It is always there with us.. You need to find it..

You may not find contentment in everything in the world.. But when you dig into it, there is always some joy.. Its hidden..!!

M.K Gandhi said, "Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony"..

This looks complicated and difficult, isn't it.?

In reality, it is not..

Follow it for a day and feel the amount of satisfaction you get..

I'll share a few instances of happiness........

You speak with a friend after a long time..the days you had spend together.. the pranks.. the madness..

For my perverted friends, finding a beautiful girl would be something to be happy about.. I mean the crazy kind of happiness(You know what I mean)..

When you miss someone and they call/text you..

When you are in deep trouble and all of a sudden its solved..

You study only half the syllabus and your question booklet has them..

During your examination, a lenient invigilator comes in(That would be a jackpot for most of us)..

Happiness, according to me is the most sophisticated human emotion..

Which gets more annoying as you grow up..

Little babies, if you've noticed, have only two emotions..

Happiness and sadness..

And the 'sadness' is not because of their extravagance but because of their needs..

They are pure.. Unadulterated lot..

As they grow up, they learn the ways of life.. the luxuries.. Imitating others..

And the contentment is gone.!!!!

This is when the simple pleasures of life mean nothing to them..

Life is short and unpredictable..

Live every bit of it.. Don't worry about the future.. Stop thinking of the events in the past..
Live today.. Live now..

Be happy and make others happy..

Spread joy......!!!

The world would be a better place to live...


"Nobody really cares if you are miserable, so you might as well be happy" ~Cynthia Nelms

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Inevitable end..!!!

Every beginning has an ending..

Life is no different..

A person has to depart some day.. That is the reason, we are called 'mortal'..

"Life & death are two faces of a coin, whose probability cannot be determined.."

It just happens.. You don't have control over it..

It is your destiny..

You are born when you had to.. You die when you have to..

All the incidents are pre-scheduled in the Calender of Life.. You just wait for them to happen.. Good or Bad..

In the journey called life, you come across many people.. Some stay with you, some leave and some are stolen away..

There is no reason for such happenings(at-least I have not found any).. It just happens..

An incident in life changes you so much and you are no longer the same person, you were before..

The same things in life, appear different to you.. The happiness fades away.. And you are left in a gloomy world..

You go into a shell and never want to come out of it..

(All this might sound like a scene from a Bollywood movie to you, but this is how exactly it feels like..)

Your favourite song feels irritating and you begin listening to the music, you once thought boring and for the older generation..

The mind thinks in an unusual way.. You lose the analytic approach to the happenings around..

You are left in despair.. And all you can do, is blame it on your stars.. In short "destiny"..

Your astrologer will give you a better insight into this..

Sometimes, losing a person who was once the most important part of your life, is a reason..

(NO.!! I din't have a break up.. many of you would be thinking this as a reason for writing this blog)..

Sometimes, its your end, that is a reason..

But again, you are reminded of 'destiny'..

It happens when it has to..

You just need to move on.. Or let the others move on.. But in either case, you go through the same amount of emotional suffering..

All the days you spent together appear before your eyes and you can't do anything about it..

You are there every moment watching it.. helpless.!!!

The end is inevitable.. Science has only been able to postpone it by a few days..months..or years..

Every religious scripture has a mention of 'death'.. And its said that, its a way to reach god.!!

Well.. i don't think so..

Its just a way to leave all the lovable people you met on earth.. And who knows after that..

So, take life as it comes..

Don't blame things on others- they were bound to happen, no matter how hard you try to prevent their occurring..

Enjoy every bit of the short span you spend in the 'world of mortals'..

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Luxury...!

"LUXURY"...

People generally associate this word with extravagance..
As per the definition given on a popular website, luxury is a material object, service conducive to sumptuous living,usually a delicacy, elegance, or refinement of living rather than a necessity..
But this definition changes from person to person..


Luxury might be an act of buying a Yacht with all the latest technology, to a person who has a Super car..
An act of owning a Super car/bike, to a person who is driving a Maruti 800..
Having a car would be luxury to a person who owns a 2-wheeler.. A bike, for someone who has no vehicle..


Owning a house would be luxury to a person who is homeless or lives in a rented house.. Or a hut..

Luxury just gets bigger with the fulfillment of a previous desire..
And when he purchases a house of his own, that will change into a necessity.. The attitude changes..
In the year 1995, a mobile phone was a toy for the Indian rich.. Today, its a basic requirement..


Necessity to a person is luxury to another..
Well, the journey from luxury to necessity is definitely not easy.. It goes through a series of psychological and financial transformations brought about by the society..


Luxury does not always refer to materialistic stuff..
To someone, spending quality time with their family, would be luxury..
Having friends is a luxury to those who don't have any..(difficult to digest this statement, but ask someone who has faced it)

Getting an undisturbed sleep is luxury to an Insomniac..




I redefine 'luxury' as something which is difficult to get..
That is unattainable.. And achieving it is a challenging job..
You can surely live without it too..

Remembering 9/11...

Its been 10 years since the biggest terror strike on the United States of America..
The day, commonly referred to as "September 11" or "September 11th  brought about a big change in the world..
It was only after this tragedy, that the world got to know the actual terrorism, that resides somewhere in Afghanistan..


I still remember that Tuesday evening(morning in USA), when this happened.. Nothing was known until a passenger jet crashed in the twin towers of the World Trade Center(WTC)..
Later, another jet crashed at the Pentagon..
The visuals shown on TV channels were heart-rendering..
This attack was not just an attack on a country; it was an attack on the entire world community..
World's tallest building had demolished..
The twin-towers no longer stood there..


This was the second terror attack on world trade center..
In 1993, there was a high intensity blast in the building..


This shook the whole world.. The power of terrorism was beyond expectation..
More than 3000 people died and hundreds injured were left under the debris..


No one could have imagined that a group of 19 men would create such havoc..
The untoward incident changed the image of our Muslim brothers, throughout the globe..
Bollywood movie 'My name is Khan' had a good message regarding the same..

Little children became orphans.. Lives were shattered..

This attack on humanity can never be forgotten..

10 years after the attack, there is some sense of satisfaction of having avenged the pain.. The killing of Osama Bin Laden, came in as a big news on 2nd May 2011..

A tribute to 911

Here is a tribute to all the people who lost their lives..

May their souls rest in peace..

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